I recently went to a friends baby’s 1st birthday party…it was quite a celebration. And rightfully so – celebrating our babies and their milestones are part of the joy of being a parent. There were lots of gifts, kisses, family, friends, toys, great food and drinks – all in honor of the little-one turning 1!
Something about this birthday party really stuck with me and I’ve been thinking about for the past few weeks. I starting thinking, “What if we celebrated our spouse with the same vigor we celebrate our kids?” How would our marriages be different?
For the time that I’ve been with my wife – dating and married, I’ve never celebrated her birthday, our anniversary, or any milestone about her or us with a fraction of the celebratory vigor that this little one-year-old was privileged to have on his first birthday. For the past several years, celebrating my wife’s birthday or our anniversary usually involved some small gift, a card, and going out to dinner. I won’t be winning any prizes for creativity! I guess nothing’s too bad with this, but why doesn’t the celebration of her life or our life together demand the same enthusiasm as we’ll offer our son on his birthday?
As this thought has been percolating in my mind – I’ve started to notice and pay attention to the difference between the interactions with my wife, versus the interactions with my son. And now I’ve just begun to feel guilty for being the un-enthusiastic husband. Yesterday, I came home from work and rushed through the door to eagerly greet my son whom I’ve desperately missed all day. I grabbed him, picked him up high in the air with a smile that stretched from East to West. I was overjoyed to see him. And to my wife, I offered a “Hi Sweetie”, with love nonetheless, but clearly lacking much enthusiasm!
Now my wife and I have been talking about this idea and we’re working on celebrating each other daily with as much enthusiasm as we celebrate our little guy. Celebrating our kids is certainly a gracious heavenly gift – and so much fun – but how can we love and celebrate our spouses with the same amount of vigor and enthusiasm?!?! Here are some thoughts:
- Greet – greet our spouses when we see each other with giant smiles. Let them know we are thrilled to see them too!
- Embrace – Hug, kiss, & embrace our spouse with the same enthusiasm we engage our little ones.
- Cherish – our spouses deserve the same celebration as we give our little ones. Honor our spouses on their own milestones with a similar intensity as we give our babies.
Celebrating our spouses with the same amount of enthusiasm as we do our kids can ensure the longevity of our marital quality, and hedge against the natural stressor that kids bring to marriages.
